Illustration: Maya E Shakur for FREDERICK & SOPHIE
When you’re new, you simply must introduce yourselves. It’s the rule. Hello, bonjour, buon giorno, it’s us, Frederick & Sophie! We’re best friends, city kids, and adventurers. We live around the world because our parents have a nose for opportunity and 300 per cent more revenue. This is absolutely marvelous because the world is a pretty awesome place and we get to see an awful lot of it.
We have a manny. His name is George. He is British and says that brightly colored sweaters and lemon tea is all he needs. He knows karate and the Queen of England. He travels everywhere with us because that’s his job. When he sees us he says, “Hiya Kiddos, what are you up to, this lovely mawning?” We tell him that we’re quite busy practicing our tearful goodbyes. Did you know that you must blow kisses with both of your hands? See here’s the thing of it. If you’re bound to go places, people will line up to see you off and it’s good manners to look absolutely tearful when you’re whiskered into a taxi. It’s also absolutely essential to shout, “Bon voyage and thanks a lot.”
Frederick has a dog that looks like a gorilla. His name is Wally. He likes big hugs and organic carrot cupcakes. He worries about pigeons too much. He comes with us all the time.
You absolutely cannot get to Mars without a spaceship. We’ve been in zero movies so far but this will change as soon as Sophie becomes President of Mars. Who wouldn’t want to make a movie about the President of Mars and her best friend? Frederick wants to be a space pirate with a dinosaur crew.
George says that when Sophie is President of Mars he’ll be the Intergalactic Secretary of Sweets. We like that because George is absolutely Secretary of Sweets material. He loves, loves, loves cookies and candy and caramel popcorn. Sugar makes him sing and not sleep. We sing together all the time.
You absolutely cannot sit still and do nothing. If you don’t know what to do, you can always make things up and pretend you’re a giant sea monster in search of fish and chips.
Here’s what we like to do. Go on an adventure.
Here’s a list of what else we like to do:
1. Make terrible faces.
2. Bake apfelstrudel and eat it with one slice of bacon and two scoops of ice cream for breakfast.
3. Stand on our toes for the longest amount of time.
4. Play tea-time with Wally and Nelly. George also loves tea-time. When he joins us, we call him Lord Gugelhupfski. Sometimes he’s the crown prince of Brunei.
5. Lay on the ground and look at the ceiling with sunglasses on.
6. Play Chefs and talk with a French accent until the game is finished.
7. Hobnob with people in the elevator and ask how many movies they’ve been in.
8. Go camping on a roof terrace and count comets.
9. Discuss the truth of things.
10. Wear pajamas for lunch in a train and pretend we’re spies.
11. Ride a mammoth.
Put on your lifebelt, pack your parachute, check your ticket, buy a mint. Today is going to be a gorgeous adventure! Or as George likes to say,“It’s going to be absolutely GEORGE-ous!
Frederick & Sophie
Frederick & Sophie top illustration: Maya E Shakur for FREDERICK & SOPHIE
Wally illustration: Chuchu Briquet for FREDERICK & SOPIE